Archive for the ‘intention’ Tag

Reducing Holiday Stress: Say “No” to Get to “Yes,” Plus 2 Days Left   Leave a comment

Dear Friends,

Do you find it easy to say “Yes,” to others’ requests, but hard to say “Yes” to yourself?

Do you have a vision or intention for how to spend your holidays, but get hijacked by requests that you have a hard time saying “No” to?

The holidays can be a time of joy and cheer, as well as elicit feelings of stress and pressure.

While we may enjoy all that the holidays offer as we attend parties and other events; decorate our homes; shop for special gifts; visit friends and travel to see relatives and; make our favorite holiday recipes, among other festivities, we can also feel stretched and experience a strain on our time, energy, and financial reserves.

We may rationalize our decision to forgo our own needs, because we don’t want to offend our friends and family members, or risk disapproval from those we love or value.

But saying “No” provides an opportunity for others to grow, and care for themselves, and respect your personal needs.

Here are seven tips, and related questions, to help you gain clarity and take care of yourself this holiday season:

1. Take Inventory

– When are you saying “Yes” when you would rather say “No?”

– Are there particular circumstances or people who present a challenge?

2.  Be Mindful

– How does it feel in your body when you say “Yes” instead of “No?”

– Pay attention to stress and tension.

3.  Is what you fear will happen really true?

– How do you know?

– Is what you’re afraid of happening absolutely true?

– Regardless of what has happened in the past, this is a new moment.

– How can you take care of yourself if what you’re afraid of actually happens?

4.  What is saying “Yes” costing you?

– Are you tired and forfeiting rest?

– Do you have the financial resources to travel or buy expensive presents?

– Do you want to attend the events you’ve been invited to, or go out of obligation and later feel angry or resentful?

– What other costs might there be?

5.  Are you willing to pay the price?

– If you’re answer is “Yes,” do so with awareness. What will the payoffs be?

– If your answer is “No,” what could you do instead” (See #6 below)

6.  Saying “No” takes practice

– If you’re feeling nervous about expressing yourself, you may find it helpful to write down what it is you want to say.

– Then practice with a friend, a coach, or even in the mirror!

7.  Moving Forward

– What qualities do you need to grow inside yourself in order to feel comfortable setting healthy boundaries?

– Reflect on a time you were presented with a challenge and took care of yourself by setting a healthy boundary.

– Notice how the positive sensations feel in your body, and let the feelings flow through you.

– You can also think about how you felt – perhaps you felt a sense of confidence, or felt secure or empowered.

– Let the good feelings soak in as you stay with the experience for five to 20 seconds.

As always, I would love to hear from you.

With love,


If you found today’s post helpful, please comment and share.








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Theresa Conti is a Certified Life Coach, Reconnective Healing® Practitioner, Workshop Facilitator, and author with more than 25 years experience. Theresa specializes in helping her clients manage their stress, realize their dreams, and create healthier, happier, more fulfilling lives.  


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Theresa’s TNT (Tip ‘N Tool) Blessings   Leave a comment

“Keep a happy heart.” – Joel Osteen

I was laying on the beach today in the heat of the afternoon sun in Sistiana – a lovely one hour and twenty minute boat ride from Trieste. It’s become one of my favorite places to soak in the rays (with sunscreen, of course!), relax, and bask in the beauty of the sea and the Carso.

I brought The New Earth, one of Eckhart Tolle’s books with me, and was having a grand old time relaxing and reading, with occasional breaks to take a dip and view the sea. A young man came by selling hats and asked if I wanted to buy one. He was an immigrant from Africa, whom I later learned was from Senegal. I passed on his offer the first time around – I didn’t feel a need and thought I could do better in town. About a half-hour later, as the sun progressed, I was having trouble keeping the glare out of my eyes while reading and wished he’d return. A few minutes later, he walked by, and like magic, asked if I wanted a hat! “Quanto costa?,” I asked. “Dieci euro,” he replied. Much more than I’m sure it was worth. “Okay,” I said. I chose a hat with flowered print and paid him. As he prepared to leave, I wished him a good day. He seemed a bit stunned, then gathered himself, gave me a big smile, and said “anche’te.”

Our short interaction was a blessing for both us. I felt grateful for our exchange.

Today’s TNT:

Keep an eye out for the blessings in your life. They may come in unexpected ways.

As always, I would love to hear your comments.

With love, Theresa

Feeling stuck?  Or ready for a change and would like support? I would love to speak with you. Email to schedule a Complimentary Coaching Consultation.

Theresa Conti is a Certified Life Coach, Reconnective Healing® Practitioner, and Workshop Facilitator with more than 25 years experience. Theresa specializes in helping her clients manage their stress, realize their dreams and create happier, healthier, more fulfilling lives.



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7-Steps to Transform Your Future   6 comments


Change takes place one step at a time.  As we change, we become a bigger blessing in the lives of others. This week’s blog outlines seven steps to show you how.

If you would like a little daily inspiration, visit my Facebook page, where you’ll find tips and tools, inspirational messages, educational articles, and more. (Tip: Click “Like” to receive the posts.)

And, if you live in New York, I will be doing another round of live coaching events in Forest Hills. For more information, please check the Announcements section below.

With love,

 7-Steps to Transform Your Future

As you give thought to your future – your future that may be 10 years; your future that may be 5 years; or your future that is 60 days away – you literally begin pre-paving. And then, as you move into those pre-paved moments, and as that future becomes your present, you fine-tune it by saying,’This is what I now want.’ And all of those thoughts that you have put forth about your future, right down to this moment when you are now intending what action you want to take, will all fit together to bring you precisely that which you now want to live.” – Abraham

The changes we wish to make generally happen over time. Although we might like to jump from A-Z, there are usually a few steps we need to attend to in-between.

  1. We need to know what we want.
  2. We need to believe that we can have what we want.
  3. We need to get out of our own way by identifying and releasing the blocks that may be standing in the way of our success.
  4. We need to be willing to grow. Change inevitably calls for expanding our comfort zones.
  5. We need to follow through and take actions that move us in the direction we wish to go.
  6. We need people who believe in us and support us when the going gets tough.
  7. We may need to learn new skills or develop the ones we have in order to reach the level of expertise required to create the lives we love.

As we change and grow, we become a bigger blessing to others. Our lives serve to inspire those who witness our transformation and allow for new levels of healing and fulfillment for all concerned, ourselves included.

Do you know what you want? If not, think back on the things that have brought you joy and pleasure and begin to do them. Then, affirm that you deserve to have a life you love. Be willing to grow, and take inspired actions. Seek out people who will champion you so you can soar to new levels of joy and fulfillment, and discover what you need to learn or know in order to realize your dreams and goals.

Affirmation:  I know what I want and have the courage required to move forward.

Need Support?

It would be my pleasure to speak with you.

Schedule a 30-minute complimentary coaching session by telephone or Skype by Emailing

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Announcements: New Free Coaching Events

Free In-Person Coaching Sessions in Forest Hills, New York

Do you have a dream or goal you would like to realize, but are having a hard time doing it on your own? As a Certified Life Coach, my goal is to help you get from where you are to where you want to be!

If you live in New York, or plan to visit the city, stop by the Red Pipe Cafe, located in Forest Hills, for a free 30-minute coaching session. As I usually offer Introductory Coaching Sessions by telephone and Skype, this is a wonderful opportunity to connect in person. During our time together, you will:

* Identify your greatest goals and desires

* Discover what’s holding you back

* Create an action plan to move forward

I guarantee you will receive greater clarity.

Dates:  Saturday, May 9 & May 23 2015

Time:   1:00 p.m. – 5:45 p.m. (Last appointment is at 5:15 p.m.)

Location: Red Pipe Cafe, 71-60 Austin Street, Forest Hills, NY

Reservations aren’t necessary, but will guarantee your appointment. To schedule your free 30-minute coaching session, email

Don’t know your schedule? No worries. Walk-ins are welcome.
I look forward to seeing you there.

Have a friend who might be interested? Feel free to share.

Theresa Conti is a Certified Life Coach, Reconnective Healing® Practitioner and Workshop Facilitator. She is the author of “I Am the Treasure,” a book of inspirational poetry, and creator of “Harvest Your Light,” a guided meditation program. Theresa has created and facilitated workshops on stress management, work/life balance, intuition development and other topics for law firms, hospitals, higher education, and other organizations. Theresa specializes in helping her clients gain clarity and direction about their life paths and guides them in identifying and achieving their dreams. For more information, please visit Theresa’s website or contact her at


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Your Best Place   Leave a comment


Wow! I can’t believe it’s the first of March. Firsts always bring a sense of renewal and excitement, whether it’s the start of a new month, project, relationship or adventure. Each “first” is a part of our personal journey and, if when we let them, open doors that expand and enrich our lives.

 “How you view life makes all the difference in world.” – Joel Osteen

Years ago, after finishing a four-year program as a Practitioner at the Center for Spiritual Living in Seattle, I was looking for a volunteer position as a way to give back to my community. I contacted two therapists whose work I resonated with and respected. One was a grief counselor, named Bonnie, whose support group I attended at Unity Church after my mother died. The other was Leonard Shaw, a therapist who was conducting workshops on Love and Forgiveness at the Washington State Reformatory, and whose program I attended a year or so prior at a local organization in Seattle.

I initially called Bonnie, as we had a personal connection, and she was the first to come to mind. I tried several times and left a few messages, but all to no avail.  I let it go and knew there must be another answer.  Shortly thereafter, I thought of Leonard and the work he was doing at the prison; perhaps he could use a hand. I found his number on an old brochure and gave him a call. The phone rang twice, then he picked up and said hello. I introduced myself, somewhat nervously as we hadn’t formally met, and shared my idea with him. He laughed as he told me he had been looking for someone to facilitate another program at the reformatory.  Voila! The Universe answered and we were both delighted!

Although it usually took quite some time for a new program to be approved and move through the prison’s bureaucracy, the doors flung open after contacting the person in charge of volunteers that Leonard had referred me to.  I attended an orientation, submitted a program proposal, and within a few short weeks began facilitating a monthly support group with inmates, their families and other prison volunteers as participants.

Working at a maximum security prison has its challenges, as you can imagine, but I was blown away by how open and receptive the inmates were.  True, not all, but I grew to love and respect the ones I met and who so openly shared their experiences while participating in mine and Leonard’s programs.

I began my group with a healing meditation and passed around Angel Cards and a Talking Stone. We sat in a circle and took turns sharing our feelings and thoughts, and the insights we gained from the Angel Cards we choose, with full attention on the person who was speaking. I then facilitated an interactive exercise, such as drawing, storytelling or watching and restructuring our thoughts.  My intention for the group was to help the men take responsibility for their choices and the direction in which they wanted their lives to go. The foundation of the group was healing.

Here are a few of their comments:

“You have a way of making everyone feel like that they are a worthwhile and loving human being.” – Bill

“You have given me a glimpse of what I can become if I so choose.” – Michael

“I love your ability to share with others, without expectation, truths you have discovered and live by from your own experiences.” – Vern

My work at the reformatory was one of the most rewarding experiences of my 30-year career. I often exited the prison grounds feeling like I received so much more than I gave and left with a heart full of gratitude.

Although I didn’t know it at the time, attending Leonard’s workshop a year prior to contacting him was the first step in bringing my work to the prison. Bonnie’s lack of reply was the second.

Although you may feel discouraged when things don’t work out the way you planned, or take longer than you wish, there’s always another door waiting for you to open it. It may even lead to someplace better than you expected.

As always, I would love to hear your thoughts.  Please click the “Comments” tab at the top of the page to share them.

Richest blessings,


 If you know someone who may find this post helpful, please forward.   

To join Theresa’s mailing list and learn about special offers or receive information on her 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed Coaching Programs, email her at

Theresa Conti is a Certified Life Coach, Reconnective Healing® Practitioner and Workshop Facilitator. She is the author of “I Am the Treasure,” a book of inspirational poetry, and creator of “Harvest Your Light,” a guided meditation program. Theresa has created and facilitated workshops on stress management, work/life balance, and other topics for law firms, hospitals, higher education, and other organizations. Theresa specializes in helping her clients gain clarity and direction about their life paths and guides them in identifying and achieving their dreams. For more information, please visit Theresa’s website or contact her at


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Leave the Harbor!   Leave a comment


Are you moored (bored?) or ready to set sail and leave the safety of the harbor?

Saturday marked my one month anniversary of having set sail for Italy to explore the possibility of moving here. I am having a wonderful experience, however, it’s not always bread and roses. I am traveling solo, and there are time when I experience fear, doubt, and question the sanity of my decision to extend my trip and remain until January.

A couple of weeks ago, I reached out to a friend for support.  In response, she sent me a link to the blog below.  It is with great pleasure that I share it with you, should you need a little inspiration to leave the safety of the harbor.

As for me, in addition to my expedition to Italy, I am exploring the wonders of nature and recently spent a week in Austria. The photo (which you can see by signing up on my mailing list) was taken during my drive across the Grossglockner High Alpine Road.

Thanks Keith! There are time when we all need a little encouragement and inspiration.

“Leave the Harbor!” is reprinted with permission from Keith Smith, Author & Musician.

“A Ship in the Harbor is Safe, but That’s Not What Ships Are Built For.” – John A. Shedd

Comfort.  Security.  Stability.  Familiar.  We all want our lives to have these things, and yet, we also want to accomplish great things, be extraordinary, experience new and wonderful things.  Sometimes we nearly succeed in convincing ourselves that we can have much, but risk little.  This simply is not true.  Any worthwhile endeavor, any good thing worth the effort it takes to obtain it will have attached to it an element of risk.  Finding your true love is amazing, life changing and euphoric yet there is the risk of being hurt or rejected.  Discovering your purpose in life is indescribably fulfilling, yet there is the risk of being misunderstood or even unappreciated.


Using the analogy contained in the quote at the beginning of this article, your life is like a ship.  You can anchor your life in the harbor, in the familiar surroundings you’ve grown accustomed to, and never risk a change of any kind.  This is safe, right?  The problem is that this is not what the ship (your life) was built for!  The ship (your life) was designed to move, to experience new surroundings, arrive at new destinations and all the while making the journey an adventure!  If a ship never leaves the harbor it will eventually decay to the point of becoming useless because it wasn’t designed to be stagnant.  It was designed to sail out of the harbor, bravely entering the vastness of the open sea and all of its possibilities.  The same is true of your life and mine.

It’s so easy to get “caught up” in life.  The bills, the kids, the job, the house, and somewhere, way down at the bottom of our to-do list, we pencil in our dreams.  You know what?  No one ever gets around to doing the last thing on their to-do list!


If we are to be successful, fulfilled and truly happy we must leave the harbor.  Each of us are unique and have something no one else does.  We’re all human with the same basic needs, and heck, we probably even all share the same universal consciousness, but we are still unique!  I am different than you and you are different than me!  We each have our own viewpoint, interpretation, and thoughts about people and our world.  I read something in a book recently that said that “the world needs what we have to offer.  If it didn’t, we wouldn’t be here!”  If we stay anchored in the harbor, how can we make a difference in the world?

“Do One Thing Every Day That Scares You.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

Are there opportunities for you, right now, that perhaps you’ve been putting off or avoiding?  Are there actions you could be taking that you know would set you on the path to success and fulfillment?  Has fear of the unknown, failure or rejection kept you stationary?  Has the effort required to sail your life into the sea of possibility kept you anchored in the harbor?

I am choosing, right this moment, to not allow fear or any form of laziness to stagnate my life.  I’ve hoisted anchor, my ship is moving toward the open sea.  As I stand on the bow, the wind in my face and the salty spray fills the air around me, I am both wonderfully frightened and emboldened for what lies ahead.  It is unknown and full of possibility.  I embrace the adventure of the journey as much as I will embrace my destination.

I hope to see you out there…..

“He Who is Brave is Free.” – Seneca

To read other blogs written by Keith Smith, visit

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In keeping with my personal call and journey, I will be working from Italy this fall. As always, I am available for coaching and distant Reconnective Healing appointments via telephone and Skype. To schedule an appointment, or learn more about the work, please email or call me  at 1-718-618-4300 (a free call anywhere within the United States).


If so, I would love to connect with you! Please join me on Facebook, where I will be posting insights and photos about my journey.  To receive the posts, and/or add your comments, click on the Facebook link below. Be sure to click on the “Follow” button on the upper right hand column to receive the posts.  To sign up on my mailing list, click the “Join My List” button, located on the left hand side of my Facebook page.

Theresa Conti is a Certified Life Coach and Reconnective Healing Practitioner with more than 25 years experience in the healing field.  She specializes in helping her clients gain clarity and direction about their life paths, resulting in greater health, happiness and fulfillment.  To join Theresa’s mailing list, click the “Join” icon on her Facebook page or email her at


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The January Challenge! and “Act As If” Experiment   3 comments

I am always amazed when I look at the calendar (January 13 today!), and am in awe at how quickly the time seems to fly! Like you, I am excited by the possibilities that the new year offers and the gifts that it contains.

We all wish to live more abundant lives. Our yearly ritual of setting intentions and clarifying our dreams is a testament to our souls’ natural desire to expand and to grow.  And, while fear may slow us down at intermittent points along the way, it will never prevent us from yearning for a bigger life. To be, experience and express more of who we are.

So, how do we step into our dreams and out of the way during times of doubt or despair and allow our souls to give birth to our new visions and ideas? Like a gardener who wishes his crops to grow, we must cultivate and fertilize the ground in preparation for our visions to unfold.

As Ernest Holmes states in his wonderful book, Creative Mind and Success,

“…we must become the thing we want. We must see it, think it, realize it, before the creative power of Mind can work it out for us…we must train our thought to see only that which we wish to experience, and since we are growing into what we are mentally dwelling upon, we should put all small and insignificant thoughts and ideals out of our thinking and see things in a larger way. We must cultivate the habit of an enlarged mental horizon.”

But how, you may wonder, do we do this?

Listed below are five powerful steps to assist you in cultivating and growing your own inner garden. Together, these steps will help you to weed out old mental patterns and charge your consciousness with new mental energy that fertilize the ground for your dreams to bear fruit. But don’t take my word for it – give it a try and see what happens! I invite you to take the challenge!

The January “Act As If” Challenge & Experiment!

Experiment:  For the next 30 days…

1.  Do something every day that inspires you.

It could be prayer and meditation, inspirational reading, a walk in nature, taking photographs, writing, working on a project, painting, dancing, etc. Even five minutes a day is enough to free your creativity and connect to your Higher Mind.

2.  Don’t complain! (Probably the BIGGEST challenge!)

“Should” you catch yourself complaining – to yourself or someone else – simply notice, stop and redirect your attention to another thought, activity or conversation. It will help your friends, too!

3.  Keep a Gratitude Journal

Focusing on gratitude is more than a nice thing to do. It’s powerful. That which we appreciate and focus our attention on grows. Like giving nutrients to a plant, give thanks every day for all that you have and all that you have received – this could be as simple as a compliment or smile or something you consider more substantial that made you feel good. Be sure to include the ways you have brought joy and healing to others. Reread your entries every few days to remind yourself of all the Good you have both given and received.

4.  “Act as if” you already have want you want. Visualize it. Feel it. Experience It. Embrace it, with all of your senses, as if it is happening now. Do this every day! Twice a day will further prime the pump and up the ante! The feeling state is creative and will do wonders to enlarge your consciousness and shape your dreams.

5.  Feel the fear and do it anyway(R)!**

Fear comes in all shapes and sizes. Procrastination abounds! Suddenly that project you’ve been avoiding seems more intriguing than that exercise class you signed up for or writing your new book. Heck, even cleaning the refrigerator looks appealing! You get the picture. We’ve all been there. So, when  you notice yourself holding back, take a deep breath and reach out for support, if needed. Then, feel the fear and do it anyway!

Practicing any of these steps will help move you in the direction of your dreams and connect you to your Higher Mind. Utilizing a combination of these steps – or all of them – will put you on the fast track. Do what you can, and remember, should you falter or forget, you can always begin a new experiment! (Progress, not perfection!)

As a helpful reminder, print or write out these five life-changing steps and place them throughout your home and office. Keeping them in the forefront of your mind will increase the likelihood of implementing them.  When you forget, simply start over again! And remember to dream!

I would love to know how it goes!

If you found this blog helpful, please “Like on Facebook” and forward to a friend.

**Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway (R) is a registered trademark of Susan Jeffers, Ph.D., which I have obtained permission to use.

To receive a list of January’s special Reconnective Healing offers, including a special pro-bono offer for people dramatically effected by our nation’s recent tragedies, please email me at to be included on my mailing list.

© Theresa Conti 2013

Theresa Conti is a Reconnective Healing Practitioner, Transformational Coach and Workshop Facilitator with more than 25 years experience in the healing field. For more information, please visit Theresa’s website at or email your questions to

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