Archive for the ‘Risk’ Tag

Reducing Holiday Stress: Say “No” to Get to “Yes,” Plus 2 Days Left   Leave a comment

Dear Friends,

Do you find it easy to say “Yes,” to others’ requests, but hard to say “Yes” to yourself?

Do you have a vision or intention for how to spend your holidays, but get hijacked by requests that you have a hard time saying “No” to?

The holidays can be a time of joy and cheer, as well as elicit feelings of stress and pressure.

While we may enjoy all that the holidays offer as we attend parties and other events; decorate our homes; shop for special gifts; visit friends and travel to see relatives and; make our favorite holiday recipes, among other festivities, we can also feel stretched and experience a strain on our time, energy, and financial reserves.

We may rationalize our decision to forgo our own needs, because we don’t want to offend our friends and family members, or risk disapproval from those we love or value.

But saying “No” provides an opportunity for others to grow, and care for themselves, and respect your personal needs.

Here are seven tips, and related questions, to help you gain clarity and take care of yourself this holiday season:

1. Take Inventory

– When are you saying “Yes” when you would rather say “No?”

– Are there particular circumstances or people who present a challenge?

2.  Be Mindful

– How does it feel in your body when you say “Yes” instead of “No?”

– Pay attention to stress and tension.

3.  Is what you fear will happen really true?

– How do you know?

– Is what you’re afraid of happening absolutely true?

– Regardless of what has happened in the past, this is a new moment.

– How can you take care of yourself if what you’re afraid of actually happens?

4.  What is saying “Yes” costing you?

– Are you tired and forfeiting rest?

– Do you have the financial resources to travel or buy expensive presents?

– Do you want to attend the events you’ve been invited to, or go out of obligation and later feel angry or resentful?

– What other costs might there be?

5.  Are you willing to pay the price?

– If you’re answer is “Yes,” do so with awareness. What will the payoffs be?

– If your answer is “No,” what could you do instead” (See #6 below)

6.  Saying “No” takes practice

– If you’re feeling nervous about expressing yourself, you may find it helpful to write down what it is you want to say.

– Then practice with a friend, a coach, or even in the mirror!

7.  Moving Forward

– What qualities do you need to grow inside yourself in order to feel comfortable setting healthy boundaries?

– Reflect on a time you were presented with a challenge and took care of yourself by setting a healthy boundary.

– Notice how the positive sensations feel in your body, and let the feelings flow through you.

– You can also think about how you felt – perhaps you felt a sense of confidence, or felt secure or empowered.

– Let the good feelings soak in as you stay with the experience for five to 20 seconds.

As always, I would love to hear from you.

With love,


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Theresa Conti is a Certified Life Coach, Reconnective Healing® Practitioner, Workshop Facilitator, and author with more than 25 years experience. Theresa specializes in helping her clients manage their stress, realize their dreams, and create healthier, happier, more fulfilling lives.  


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Traveling da Sola, Plus Special Announcements   Leave a comment

” Traveling solo does not always mean. you’re alone. Most often, you meet marvelous people along the way and make connections that last a lifetime.” – Jacqueline Boone

Although I’ve gone to many events alone since I was a teenager (concerts, movies, theater), I haven’t always liked traveling da sola. But when I was in my early 30’s, I grew tired of waiting for other people to join me and decided to venture out on my own! So last Sunday, like many other days, I packed my back and set out. This time to someplace local.

It was the first day, in too many to count, that the sun had finally come out. And what a beautiful day it was!

I began by casting my first vote, ever, in Italy’s national elections. As a dual citizen, I have the ability and privilege. It was quite a beautiful experience.

After casting my vote, I decided to hop on a boat and take the 30-minute ride to Muggia, a quaint little town across the Gulf of Trieste, which I periodically like to go to. The air felt warm on my face and hands and the ride was calm and pleasant. I had gone to Muggia just the day before, when a friend took me on a little adventure and showed me a path that stretches for miles along the shore. That’s where I was heading.

The advantage of traveling alone is that you can follow your nose and change direction whenever you feel inspired. I walked for an hour – about three miles – then decided to hop on the #7 bus and go to Lazzaretto – a small town two miles or so down the road. At first glance, it didn’t look like there was much to see, so contemplated returning to Muggia. But aha! I then spotted a sign for Vigna Sul Mar and hopped off the bus just in time – seconds before it returned to Muggia. What a glorious experience it was! I took lots of photos as I walked through the vineyard, shared an apple with a horse I befriended along the way, and later met Mr. Urizio, the vineyard’s owner, with whom I struck up a conversation. Although my Italian language skills are still pretty basic, we had a nice connection. He asked if I wanted to see the cantina where he stores his wine and oil, and of course, I was delighted! And yes, there’s more – as I was leaving, he called to me, and brought me a bottle of olive oil!

Traveling alone is an adventure! While all types of travel can help us expand and learn from each other, traveling da sola is special. It opens doors and provides us with experiences we would likely never have if we were traveling with another.


Up for some adventure, but feel uncomfortable going alone?


Choose someplace you would like to go that helps you stretch, but isn’t too far out of your comfort zone.

It could be someplace near or far, someplace new, or a place you would like to return to.


Look into resources for how to get to and fro, and timetables to help you plan your trip, if needed.


Connect with friends who have traveled alone to get their support and feedback.


If going on a day trip, consider bringing a day pack with a bottle of water and snacks.

If going further, take clothes that you can mix and match and keep your suitcase light.

When feeling anxious about striking out on your own, start small and build on your successes!

With love, Theresa




“Theresa’s book and techniques will help guide you on your path to transformation. When you create a life you love and are grateful for your life, mind, body and spirit receive the love message and all benefit.”   Bernie Siegel, M.D., Author of 365 Prescriptions For The Soul 

“A beautiful and simple concept – as easy as ABC! This sweet book offers a creative way to counter the leanings of the mind and provides exercises to stay buoyant and positive — and it offers a section to add even more affirmations to the mix! How cool is that? A great book to have on hand as a reminder that every moment is a new moment and it “affirms” that one can transform their thoughts and their lives in a quick minute. My favorite letter is Q!” – S.G.


If would you found this week’s TNT helpful, and would like to support my ongoing work, please visit my Virtual Tip Jar at PayPal.  It’s here:
Theresa Conti is a Certified Life Coach, Reconnective Healing® Practitioner, Author, and Workshop Facilitator with more 25 years experience. Theresa specializes in helping her clients manage their stress, realize their dreams and create happier, healthier, and more fulfilling lives.

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Theresa’s TNT (Tip ‘N Tool) Be Bold   Leave a comment

“Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it.” – Goethe

The term “bold” still scares the bejesus out of me – or at least the part of me that’s afraid of being eaten by tigers! And…the little kid in me who feels afraid of the unknown and wants to feel protected and safe. But that’s not who I am. The former dates back to prehistoric times and is no longer valid. The later stems from childhood and is the part of me that needs comfort and soothing. If you have similar feelings about the word “bold,” the same may be true for you.

Who we are is often more than we give ourselves permission to live up to. Change involves risk – after all, one never knows the future – or the results of the actions we take. Our primary goal is to follow our inner calling and act with confidence and faith (or act as if we have them!), as we take a breath and begin moving forward.

A question I have found helpful for myself, and often ask clients who are unhappy or dissatisfied with their current life experience is:

“What will you regret not having done when you’re lying on your death bed?”

The answer is readily apparent, when we are open to listening. And when we don’t, we will feel out of balance, and may experience depression and physical symptoms.

For me, it meant letting go of my home in New York, selling my belongings, leaving family and friends, and fulfilling my dream of relocating to Italy; re-establishing close and healthy relationships with my family; and, using my gifts and talents to be of greater service in the world. Goethe’s quote is accurate – my life is expanding and my dreams have, and are, coming true. And yours can, too.

It takes guts to move our dreams into action. But that’s what leads to greater happiness, fulfillment and magic. Are you ready to begin?


Ask yourself:

“What will I regret not having done at the end of my lifetime?”

Write your answer down and place it where you can easily see it.

Reflect on it daily.

Make a list of what it would take to accomplish.

Create an action plan to realize it.

Take the first step and open to the magic.

You’ll know you’re on track when the energy starts flowing.

If you get stuck, reach out to friends, professionals, and colleagues you know will support you.

As always, I would love to hear your comments.

With love,


Is there a goal or dream you would like to fulfill and would like support in moving forward? It would be my pleasure to speak with you. Email to schedule a Complimentary Coaching Consultation. Available internationally by Skype and U.S. telephone.

Theresa Conti is a Certified Life Coach, Reconnective Healing® Practitioner, and Workshop Facilitator with more than 25 years experience. Theresa specializes in helping her clients manage their stress, realize their dreams and create happier, healthier, more fulfilling lives.



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Happy Mother’s Day to One and All! Quotes to Inspire.   Leave a comment


Wishing a Happy Mother’s Day to all the mom’s out there! And, as we all give birth to ideas, dreams, and the lives we create, we are all mothering something!  I wish each and every one of you a happy, healthy, and joy-filled Mother’s Day! May you give birth to the gifts and talents you are here to share and treat them with loving care.

Happy Mother’s Day to One and All! Quotes to Inspire

“Hear Your Own Music.” – Dr. Eric Pearl

We all have special gifts and talents to share. So,in our own ways, we are part of the creation process, giving birth to new ideas through our words, our thoughts, our actions and imaginations. The things we create, whether tangible nor not, are like our children – and we must care for and nurture them in order for them to excel and grow.Whether we birth something tangible, that we can hold and touch, such as a baby, a book, a product, or birth something such as peace, love and gentleness, when we act from inspiration, our creations bring greater Light and Joy into the world and are part of our personal stories and missions. They feed us as much as, or more than, they feed and nourish the world.As I was sitting at The Red Pipe Cafe yesterday, in between coaching clients, I was inspired to include a few of my favorite quotes in this week’s blog. May they inspire your creations.
“Begin to practice taking small steps, doing the things you’ve avoided doing before, experiencing “little” risks and “little” adventures until your love of doing what you want and your experience at taking risks makes you confident enough that living your biggest dream is only one more “little” risky step.” – Barbara Sher
“Everyone has a purpose in life…a unique gift or special talent to give to others.
And when we blend this unique talent with service to others, we experience the ecstasy and exultation of our own spirit, which is the ultimate goal of all goals.” – Deepak Chopra”Success comes when you move unerringly forward, rejecting all that tends to distract you from your master plan.” – Catherine Ponder”Think of your work life, therefore, not as separate from your spiritual life, but as central to your spiritual life. Whatever your business, it is your ministry.” – Marianne WilliamsonAnd one of my own:
“What scares you can free you when you start taking steps to have what you truly desire.”

Wishing you a very happy, healthy, joy-filled Mother’s Day!  May all of your relations be filled with joy, peace, beauty and love.
As always, I would love to hear your comments. Just click on the “Leave a Comment” tab at the top of the page to leave yours.With love,
Theresa Conti is a Certified Life Coach, Reconnective Healing® Practitioner and Workshop Facilitator. She is the author of “I Am the Treasure,” a book of inspirational poetry, and creator of “Harvest Your Light,” a guided meditation program. Theresa has created and facilitated workshops on stress management, work/life balance, intuition development and other topics for law firms, hospitals, higher education, and other organizations. Theresa specializes in helping her clients gain clarity and direction about their life paths and guides them in identifying and achieving their dreams. For more information, please visit Theresa’s website or contact her at


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Leave the Harbor!   Leave a comment


Are you moored (bored?) or ready to set sail and leave the safety of the harbor?

Saturday marked my one month anniversary of having set sail for Italy to explore the possibility of moving here. I am having a wonderful experience, however, it’s not always bread and roses. I am traveling solo, and there are time when I experience fear, doubt, and question the sanity of my decision to extend my trip and remain until January.

A couple of weeks ago, I reached out to a friend for support.  In response, she sent me a link to the blog below.  It is with great pleasure that I share it with you, should you need a little inspiration to leave the safety of the harbor.

As for me, in addition to my expedition to Italy, I am exploring the wonders of nature and recently spent a week in Austria. The photo (which you can see by signing up on my mailing list) was taken during my drive across the Grossglockner High Alpine Road.

Thanks Keith! There are time when we all need a little encouragement and inspiration.

“Leave the Harbor!” is reprinted with permission from Keith Smith, Author & Musician.

“A Ship in the Harbor is Safe, but That’s Not What Ships Are Built For.” – John A. Shedd

Comfort.  Security.  Stability.  Familiar.  We all want our lives to have these things, and yet, we also want to accomplish great things, be extraordinary, experience new and wonderful things.  Sometimes we nearly succeed in convincing ourselves that we can have much, but risk little.  This simply is not true.  Any worthwhile endeavor, any good thing worth the effort it takes to obtain it will have attached to it an element of risk.  Finding your true love is amazing, life changing and euphoric yet there is the risk of being hurt or rejected.  Discovering your purpose in life is indescribably fulfilling, yet there is the risk of being misunderstood or even unappreciated.


Using the analogy contained in the quote at the beginning of this article, your life is like a ship.  You can anchor your life in the harbor, in the familiar surroundings you’ve grown accustomed to, and never risk a change of any kind.  This is safe, right?  The problem is that this is not what the ship (your life) was built for!  The ship (your life) was designed to move, to experience new surroundings, arrive at new destinations and all the while making the journey an adventure!  If a ship never leaves the harbor it will eventually decay to the point of becoming useless because it wasn’t designed to be stagnant.  It was designed to sail out of the harbor, bravely entering the vastness of the open sea and all of its possibilities.  The same is true of your life and mine.

It’s so easy to get “caught up” in life.  The bills, the kids, the job, the house, and somewhere, way down at the bottom of our to-do list, we pencil in our dreams.  You know what?  No one ever gets around to doing the last thing on their to-do list!


If we are to be successful, fulfilled and truly happy we must leave the harbor.  Each of us are unique and have something no one else does.  We’re all human with the same basic needs, and heck, we probably even all share the same universal consciousness, but we are still unique!  I am different than you and you are different than me!  We each have our own viewpoint, interpretation, and thoughts about people and our world.  I read something in a book recently that said that “the world needs what we have to offer.  If it didn’t, we wouldn’t be here!”  If we stay anchored in the harbor, how can we make a difference in the world?

“Do One Thing Every Day That Scares You.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

Are there opportunities for you, right now, that perhaps you’ve been putting off or avoiding?  Are there actions you could be taking that you know would set you on the path to success and fulfillment?  Has fear of the unknown, failure or rejection kept you stationary?  Has the effort required to sail your life into the sea of possibility kept you anchored in the harbor?

I am choosing, right this moment, to not allow fear or any form of laziness to stagnate my life.  I’ve hoisted anchor, my ship is moving toward the open sea.  As I stand on the bow, the wind in my face and the salty spray fills the air around me, I am both wonderfully frightened and emboldened for what lies ahead.  It is unknown and full of possibility.  I embrace the adventure of the journey as much as I will embrace my destination.

I hope to see you out there…..

“He Who is Brave is Free.” – Seneca

To read other blogs written by Keith Smith, visit

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In keeping with my personal call and journey, I will be working from Italy this fall. As always, I am available for coaching and distant Reconnective Healing appointments via telephone and Skype. To schedule an appointment, or learn more about the work, please email or call me  at 1-718-618-4300 (a free call anywhere within the United States).


If so, I would love to connect with you! Please join me on Facebook, where I will be posting insights and photos about my journey.  To receive the posts, and/or add your comments, click on the Facebook link below. Be sure to click on the “Follow” button on the upper right hand column to receive the posts.  To sign up on my mailing list, click the “Join My List” button, located on the left hand side of my Facebook page.

Theresa Conti is a Certified Life Coach and Reconnective Healing Practitioner with more than 25 years experience in the healing field.  She specializes in helping her clients gain clarity and direction about their life paths, resulting in greater health, happiness and fulfillment.  To join Theresa’s mailing list, click the “Join” icon on her Facebook page or email her at


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